The Mezunian

Die Positivität ist das Opium des Volkes, aber der Spott ist das Opium der Verrückten

Mario Kart: Super Circuit

My opinion on Mario Kart: Super Circuit has flipflopped o’er the years: @ 1st I remembered it fondly, then I played it ‘gain round the late 2000s & realized how shitty the controls were, & now I’ve gotten round to not disliking it so much. I still can’t comprehend this game’s controls, no matter how much I’ve practiced & no matter how many defenders online claim that it’s great once you get used to them.

That said, I do have to acknowledge that it was a precursor to many o’ the things that made Mario Kart DS so great, like retro courses & rankings. It also does have great music & memorable race tracks, like “Ribbon Road,” “Sunset Wilds,” “Sky Garden,” the rainy “Luigi Circuit,” & “Cheese Land.” & e’en if the graphics are so blurry that they look like a drunk-driving stimulator & Luigi’s voice sounds as if he’d taken helium (apparently this was his original Japanese voice in Mario Kart 64), there’s a charm to them. Also, it’s not as if he’s any less annoying in Mario Kart 64 (I still have “¡BINGO! ¡HO-HO-HO!” & “¡MAMAMIIAAAAA!” lodged in my god damn head). I only wish it had “¡LUIGI IS THE POPE!” like in the Japanese Mario Kart 64.

An example o’ my tremendous skill @ this game.

The retro courses were just all o’ the tracks from Super Mario Kart, but with updated graphics & divided into 5 cups o’ 4 courses ‘stead o’ the original 4 cups o’ 5 courses, which ‘splains the addition o’ the “Lightning Cup.” However, many o’ the obstacles that were in the original aren’t in these, which is lame, & the graphics are mostly just the same as the main tracks’, making me think these were sort o’ shoved in @ the last second.

To unlock them, one must get a star ranking on a cup after getting gold on every 150cc cup. Other than that, the only unlockables are 2 different title screens: the sunset title screen, which one also gets for getting gold on all 150cc cups & is quite easy, & the night title screen with new music, which requires getting a 3 star ranking on every regular cup, which is borderline impossible. I doubt hardly anyone has done this, since I can’t find any screenshots or YouTube videos o’ it (though I was able to find a save file online, I guess). Then ‘gain, maybe it’s just that nobody gave a shit ’bout Mario Kart: Super Circuit & just ne’er bothered.

¿Have you gotten the night title screen in Mario Kart: Super Circuit? Nobody cares, you narcissistic braggart.

Posted in GBA Tribute, Video Games