OK, you’ve got me:
You’ve figured out my devious plot,
you clever bastards, you.
I admit it:
my antisocial ways
were nothing but a plot
to bring you all to your ankles.
I’ve been fooling you fuckers this whole time.
You must admit,
’twas an impressive trick;
how long it all went on,
like Andy Kaufman.
I had everything to gain, too.
Just look at me--
Pope on the hill with his arms spread,
feeling the breeze,
hoarding so much o’ the breeze from you all.
ha ha ha ha ha!
I bet you had so many better uses for that air I sucked,
To late to get ’em back, Tim!
But I knew you’d catch me in the act soon.
The rat’s always snatched by the clever cats.
& you were all such clever cats...
But that’s OK.
I’m perfectly prepared to accept my punishment.
I deserve it.
So, what are you waiting for?
You’ve already carefully collaborated all o’ the evidence you need.
So bulk up,
be honest with yourself for once,
& once & for all, do the necessary deed gainst me.