I. A Boring Public Service Announcement

My favorite part ’bout a lot o’ “positive” people—not all o’ them, you whiny bastards I imagine might complain if anyone read this dreck—is how they oft use it as a way to mask the fact that they’re oft terrible people. This makes sense: positivity is aesthetically pleasing—to most people, a’least—& thus does a better job o’ hiding any ugliness ’neath.

This is why a lot o’ narcissistic know-it-alls are cynics: they love the challenge o’ being as ugly & provocative as possible; if people still find their arguments compelling under such ugliness, well, they must be truly good arguments. Positivity, meanwhile, is oft used to hide the most banal—& oft revoltingly reactionary, as in Goins’ case I went over in ’nother article—garbage.

Indeed, it shouldn’t be surprising that “positivity” & “reactionary” should be affiliated as they are both based on the evidenceless belief that the status quo is valid & that those who don’t agree with it are just “negative.” Women who complain ’bout sexism are just whiny bitches who need to quit bitching & “lean in”—into the CEO’s dick, amirite? Sweat-shop workers in developing nations need to quit whining & learn to love their life-long gruel. After, all they clearly chose to live that way, since humans can clearly do whatever they want—fuck the complexities o’ reality!

Positivity is also linked quite oft with power, while cynics are universally despised. This is, ’course, ’cause power structures are mo’ powerful when people think ’bout all its good points than its bad. This is why there will always be a seat in bland political talk shows for ditsy morons who just spew ’bout the American Dream & how democratic the US is, despite all o’ the scientific evidence gainst either.

“Positive” Americans try to take credit for the positive aspects o’ attacking power that led to our present status quo, ’course. For instance, Martin Luther King Jr. was “positive” when he attacked blatant racism, which we ’course know is evil now, but the people who criticize deeper racism that exist today or economic issues are just complainers. Never mind the fact that MLK Jr. considered the civil rights movement a failure ’cause it didn’t go far ’nough—’specially in terms o’ economics. Reality isn’t as important as the ability for positive successful people to feel superior to people & the past without having to reevaluate their own situation—to do so would be negative, after all.

II. Be Who I Tell You To Be Or Else 🙂

On the subject o’ revolting “positive” reactionaries is a Lifehacker—what the fuck is that s’posed to mean?—article ’bout the positive topic o’ how cynics are all assholes & should mend their disgusting ways. ’Stead, he literally advocates lying so that you fit in—which shows that the shallowness o’ Klosowski’s philosophy matches the shallowness o’ his writing.

To be fair, one can’t go wrong with introspection—lord knows, Americans could use some self-awareness for once—to examine how one’s behavior affects others & a way to balance that with one’s own emotional concerns, which may include counseling.

’Course, Klosowski doesn’t advocate that or even consider the option, since he probably can’t even comprehend the idea o’ someone pondering a subject for longer than the average simple point-by-point slideshow that all o’ these articles try emulating.

’Stead, you should just adjust your personality to how he wants it; & if that causes conflict with your friends or family, well, good: they’re not good friends, anyway. See, where I come from, this is called a “cult.”

Only later, after bashing cynics for paragraphs, does he turn round & admit the strengths o’ cynics & flaws o’ optimists. Well, then why didn’t you call this article “Balancing Positivity & Negativity”? Would’ve saved me the time o’ typing this shit—time that could’ve been spent doing nothing but bashing other people’s work ’cause I secretly want to be them, please be my best friend, sniff.

God damn it, the only times centrism is ever logical is when nobody’s ever centrist yet ’gain.

I started with the balanced point. (I said that not all positive people are bad ’fore proceeding to bash positive people; that’s balanced.) ’Cause I’m better.

Also, it’s funner to lure the optimists in with candy ’fore dumping my waste bin right onto their faces.

III. Cynics Are Shitty Artists

’Nother article peddles some pseudoscientific test ’bout problem-solving & uses that to argue that creativity & positivity are purportedly linked—’cause Pinola apparently knows nothing ’bout creativity.

Why is it that all o’ these positivity lovers also love such obvious shams? Yeah, a website called “Positive Ratio” that promises that “Positivity shows you how to tap into your hidden emotional potential to achieve a flourishing life” sounds truly credible. I’d totally cite that in my college papers. Here’s a tip, dipshit: if a website claims to guarantee a “flourishing life,” it’s a scam; elsewise, we’d have solved world hunger by now.

To be fair, she has a point: cynics have never created good art, ever. Think o’ how much better Nirvana’s music would’ve been if Cobain thought positively for once. & “Waste Lands.” (Sigh.) I don’t see why T. S. Eliot couldn’t have been constructive for once & not mire in such worthless bleakness.

& don’t get me started on Jonathan Swift, who only ever had mean things to say ’bout everything. Maybe ’stead o’ making all o’ those snarky attacks gainst the British government, whom I’m sure were doing the best they could for the starving Irish, he could’ve looked @ the positive aspects—how such mistakes made us stronger!

IV. Treat Cynicism Like the Plague

I also love how much “positive” advice tells you to stay ’way from unpositive people. Hey, is someone withdrawn ’cause their mother’s dead or something? Stay ’way from that dead weight! Don’t want the cool kids @ the capitalist table not to let us join their clique.

How ’bout I avoid “positive” people, ’stead. They sound like privileged, bigoted assholes.

This is probably frivolous—but then, isn’t everything I write?—but I wanted to make ’nother quick post on Mankiw & my grotesque fascination with his rhetorical philosophy, which I think shows the general counterintuitive philosophy o’ centrists: that one becomes smarter when one thinks as li’l as possible.

In an admittedly-rather-ol’ post, Mankiw uses the same patronizing moderate frown he used in the last article I mocked when discussing some hippie @ Ad Busters making fun o’ Mankiw for be a mindless Squealer for economists. Mankiw’s response is… “Yes, that’s exactly what I am.”

When I teach introductory economics, either in the classroom or in my textbook, I view myself as an ambassador for the economics profession. I try to represent the economic mainstream, not my personal political views. Some students may view the economic mainstream as right of center. That assessment is probably correct, at least as judged by the universe of college professors. But the job of an introductory course is to present, as honestly as possible, the consensus of the profession.

Thus, Mankiw’s defense is literally, “If the majority o’ economists say so, it must be right.”

I also love how before that he makes the same simplified story that centrist economists always make ’bout how the right is mean to them, too—O, who is mo’ assailed than mainstream economists? Why aren’t they given reparations already?—& then says, “I suppose the symmetry in the attacks suggests I am getting things about right.”

Reading this quote—as well as the rest o’ the article—notice what Mankiw neglects to do—what he neglects to do in most o’ his work? He neglects to make an actual logical point. Nowhere in his work do I ever see rational arguments. His defenses gainst cries o’ political bias are nothing mo’ than saying that, well, his political bias is the correct 1, which is the center—the US’s dominant ideology. How ironic that centrists like Mankiw can only ever criticize such “extreme” “ideologues” through ideological language, such as criticizing work purely for being “leftist” or “right-wing” or focusing purely on where ideas stand on some imaginary “left-right” spectrum. This is unsurprising coming from a study that takes pride in focusing purely on abstract—i.e. made up in people’s minds—matters, rather than concrete matters.

That the center could be just as ignorant & biased as the left or right eludes Mankiw completely. Never mind the fact that the center has, in the past, included such reasonable arguments that black people & women were inferior, as it includes such reasonable arguments that poor people are inferior today. Those centrists were ’course wrong; but we’re not, ’cause society has clearly learned all that we need. That American centrism is significantly different from the centrism in many other countries is also irrelevant. Those centrists are ’course silly extremists; but we’re not, ’cause… the answer always eludes.

What this tells me is not, as centrists like Mankiw clearly want me to think, that they are just ’bove such vulgarities as political opinions, but that they are just intellectual cowards who are ’fraid to confront their political biases—probably ’cause they’re not confident in their intellectual abilities to ensure that these are biases are logically defensible, ’cause they probably know deep down that what they want & get contradict what a logical ethical system should give them.

Otherwise, a Harvard economist like Mankiw may question, as the Anti-Mankiw article he linked, why his tenure is so great & why he derives so much influence for then-Presidents like George W. Bush when he can’t even ’splain his beliefs without freshmen-level logical fallacies such as “appeal to popularity” or the “golden mean.”

That, or Mankiw may just be a shameless lawyer who spews out rhetoric in the hopes o’ distracting people from the rational fact that he takes in phat loot for spewing propaganda beneficial to powerful classes—which is not just corporations! As any centrist economist will tell you, they also stands for such left-wing, Keynesian ideals as supporting underdogs like the government, too! After all, without government, who will jail the dirty hobos when they perturb white middle-class sensibilities when asking for dimes?

Addendum

In the spirit o’ smugfaced centrism, can I take a second to laugh @ the fact that a leftist organization would call themselves “post-autism economics.” As you can see, the prissy left still hasn’t left their PC fascism. If this were a true-blue conservative organization, you know they would get right to the heart o’ language & call themselves “economics for people who aren’t fucking social retards who might also be Jews I’m not sure yet though if you figure out the secrets o’ the Corporatist Marxist Jew Cabal please tell me ’K thank you.”

Mankiw, as any good-sporting centrist, is “intrigued” by this movement, which is good to hear. As any sensible person will tell you, you must always look @ both sides in every conflict:—there are never mo’ than 2 sides, that’s just too crazy to even consider!—both the bigoted & the nonbigoted.

Actually, we shouldn’t be surprised, since we’re talking ’bout economics, & anyone faintly interested in economics is probably halfway toward becoming a desensitized sociopath. This even includes those who treat economics purely as bile fuel,—an environmentally-friendly energy source, you hippies should appreciate—as anyone reading anything else I’ve written here should have gleaned.

Holding a name brimming with realism & depth, I’m shocked to see that Idealists Careers’ advice for what to research before a job interview is not such silly things as pay, duties, benefits, & such, but what this company does in the community & what their “values” are.

(Hint: If this value is anything but “making money,” said company probably won’t last long. ’Course, they also won’t last long if they admit that outright; the difference is ’tween smart executives who know they’re bullshitting for strategic purposes & people who write dreck like this. ’Less they’re just bullshitting for strategic purposes, too…)

“You know, if I don’t pay these bills they’ll repossess my car & my children will starve… but how can I take their filthy lucre when they don’t even let me hang up my Brony posters?”

1 o’ these carefully-chosen answers was yourself, which I’m sure caused the writer to orgasm @ the depth o’ her writing, even if it makes no sense in the concrete. To be fair, she does have a point: you never know when some stalker executive will dig through your ol’ personal affairs & judge you for them. “You listen to Less Than Jake? You’re no true punk fan, you fucking poser. Get out o’ my office!”

I remember I got my job when my interviewer showed me a rant I scrawled on the internet with my feces ’bout butchering all o’ the bourgeoisie¹ & the yuppie douches who want to be bourgeoisie, but they’ll never be, give it up already. We had a hearty laugh ’bout that.

It’s sad that after Goins’ bold salute to mediocre writing, he’s now¹ changed his mind, calling “jack-o-all-trades” morons who like sports.

Ironically, he’s talking ’bout writing; but writing is 1 o’ the few industries where having well-rounded skills is a boon—a’least for fiction writers. Fiction-writing involves creating believable worlds, which are usually inspired by, even if not based on, the real world. Knowledge o’ the real world can involve knowledge in everything. Want to write a good biologist & truly understand their point o’ view? Researching biology will help. & yes, though sports don’t interest me, even I acknowledge that knowledge o’ sports would benefit someone writing a sports story.

Contrariwise, no one will ever be a master @ writing, since one can always improve—though perhaps that applies to everything.

But then, I don’t think this article was meant as a serious philosophical question—for 1, “serious” & “philosophical” never go together. ’Stead it’s meant to congratulate himself for being “nerdy” & “alternative,” man. Everyone says this ’bout themselves—even people who were bullies; it’s just that everyone likes to think o’ themselves as victims who succeeded gainst unbelievable odds, rather than honestly acknowledging that we all succeed ’cause we weren’t born in a place where children are forced to fight for their survival gainst rabid tigers (’less you were, reader, in which case you admittedly probably did earn your success gainst unbelievable odds & you may ignore this critique).

I listened to Led Zeppelin and wore baggy T-shirts. I was not cool, and I paid the price for it in social capital. That awkward feeling of being left out lingers with me even today. Because I still do things that make me weird.

He must’ve grown up in the 50s when not following a carefully-orchestrated set o’ instructions for walking down a hall got you labeled an insane commie. See, in my school days, being “weird” was considered cool—& by weird I mean the definition he uses: not authentically gross to society, like a man wearing skirts & makeup or having a massive facial deformation for life, but liking a famous band & wearing imperfectly-pressed clothing. Harmless weird: the kind o’ weird that feeds the feeling o’ rebellion but without actually having the immense social pressures that warrant that feeling. All I hear ’bout is how awesome being a nerd is, since it fits the pattern perfectly, even if their only criteria is that they push buttons on a hunk o’ plastic plugged into a TV every once in a while.

This is all used to regurgitate the same myth o’ the genius loser who becomes rich—where I come from, if you’re not living every second in cold-sweat fear o’ frostbite from wandering the subarctic urban wilderness in homelessness, you’re rich, so I’m going to assume Goins is rich—due to their genius loserness. This despite the fact that social skills are the most useful skill for success & the reality that most powerful people are actually morons. Have you ever listened to a business executive or politician open his—usually his—mouth? Those are the geniuses who rule the world?

The irony is that the world’s true losers probably aren’t the 1s sitting round measuring their victim dicks—probably ’cause they’re actually victims, & thus too busy running from the totalitarian government snatchers hunting them down & can’t type ’cause their hands have been chopped off & had arthritis, anyway. Also they have cancer, but that hasn’t impeded them from blogging yet.

Life is not an accident for these people [“people who matter,” as opposed to those who should just kill their shitty selves]; they are living intentionally.

You hear that victims o’ that tsunami? Stop letting accidents rule your lives, already! ’Course, many o’ these people don’t have lives anymore, so we can see that Goins’ philosophy has turned true!

This is the cost of greatness. (And I’m learning to embrace it.)

Ha, ha, ha! What a cocksucker.

I also love the book he quotes that uses “you” to contrast those other “fools,” the intended audience obviously intended to feel the author’s hand reach out into their pants. “O yes! O yeah! Please tell me I’m special mo’. O yeah… That’s so goood.”

[Paragraphs that can be summarized as, “Having capabilities that deserve praise for being based on effort require actual effort, dumb ass.”]

I’m glad that he feels the need to tell me this. I’m sure there are plenty o’ people who somehow missed the billion other inspirational puke smacking their foreheads & going, “You mean sitting on my couch & scratching my dick doesn’t get me rich?” ’Course, as we gleaned earlier, this article isn’t aimed @ those people. You’re obviously not 1 o’ them. No, he’s talking ’bout the bad, lazy people—the poor slobs, the dirty people. Essentially, he’s talking ’bout social stereotypes—ironically attacking the very misfits o’ which he only pretends to be. It’s the same reactionary bizarro world regurgitated a million times: us poor rich geniuses are being pulled down by the immensely powerful lazy bums!

You will be tempted to resign and give in to the taunts of your enemies and critics.

Yes, lets shake our fists @ the mean ol’ critics. They aren’t artists after all, who put work into their satire as much as other writers. No, only those who don’t satire artists—the very class that coincidentally always makes this point—can be considered artists. Artists, after all, are very sensitive, unlike those lazy bums who scratch their groins & treat their radioactive poisoning as an accident.

How many enemies do writers earn? Maybe if these writers are revolutionaries actively trying to topple governments. But is some dork who scribbles inspirational “lit fics” ’bout dogs with cancer—I don’t know if Goins writes these; he could write sci-fi parodies for all I know—truly going to rile up someone ’nough to make them call for their blood & want to wear their skin as a suit?

I mean, I always felt that way ’bout my favorite authors, but that was out o’ love, not ’cause we’re enemies. Why can’t you understand basic empathy, Goins, you sociopath?

Your hands will crack and bleed, your back will hurt, and you will cry.

Well, a’least I got this part right. Though I didn’t even know this had anything to do with me writing; I never even thought ’bout why ’twas so fun.

In all of this, you will be humbled and humiliated…

I’ve noticed that those who praise humility rarely exhibit it themselves, & this includes Goins, who just earlier admitted his love for the cost o’ his greatness. This is probably ’cause humble people quickly learn that in a cut-throat competitive world, admitting that others are better is ’bout as effective as a mouse lying right before a cat. ’Course, the hunt also involves headology & thus pretending to be humble is a great way to lure your victims into a false feeling o’ safety so the pounce will be mo’ successful.

What I’m saying is, Goins wants to eat people, though you shouldn’t be surprised to find such behavior in the kind o’ maniac who listens to Led Zeppelin o’ all things.

Understand what you’ll have to give up, how you’ll be misunderstood, and the loneliness associated with any kind of greatness or leadership.

Yes, people who control others are the true victims o’ society. For instance, I always remember whenever I see some poor Yemenese person whose name will never be remembered by anyone be blown into bloody bones & ashes from a drone dropped on her, a tear ran down the President’s cheek as he pondered the loneliness deep in his heart from all o’ the people who don’t understand him, man. Then he writes shitty beat poetry & that sympathy all goes ’way.

See, I must confess my philosophical difference: if I were to compare leaders & “great”—successful—people to, say, mentally-aberrant homeless bums, I’d say the latter is probably a tad bit lonelier. Granted, the former is probably only having his—usually his, let’s be honest here—dick stroked so his “greatness”—his power—will rub off on them.

In fact, I’d wager that a society where people think only ’bout how they can be masters over other people & how the spirit o’ the bullies from their past still block their paths with said spirits’ evil mediocrity might be a quite lonely place to live no matter who you are. I’m sure Goins would disagree; but then, he’s surely part o’ the conspiracy gainst me, which is why all o’ my fan fiction are rejected by those corporate fascists @ Penguin, just as those corporate fascists in high school called my stories submitted to the papers gay—they were bisexual, you ditzy Cises!

For me, it’s been writing — pursuing how to do something as best I can (and giving up a lot of other pursuits in the process).

You know, I take back everything I said before—well, ’cept for the part ’bout me liking to wear my favorite writers’ skin like a suit. Consider this line & then look back & consider the quality o’ work he’s crafted. I change my tune: Goins, you now have my heartfelt sympathy.

The irony in all of this is that in my disdain for sports I’m actually learning what it means to be an athlete — what it means to strive and strain and push through the pain to achieve a goal.

[There was a pause here while I jabbed a fist into my maw to stifle the loud guffaws. Well, that & ’cause I like the taste o’ my flesh.]

I, too, grit my teeth when I feel the gravelly pain stump into my fingers from the billion keyboard taps! ’Course, this isn’t from my writing, but from my simple joy o’ slamming my fingers gainst hard objects. But still!

If the idea of hustling like you’ve never hustled and hurting like you’ve never hurt before actually appeals to you, then there’s hope.

Then I guess there’s no hope, ’cause that phrase sounds terribly written. When I think o’ “hustling,” I don’t think “work”; I think shitty dancing.

Even worse, you probably stole that line from a Poison song.

As for me, I’m tired of being good at many things, of being a jack-of-all-trades. I want to be a master of one.

I’m always awed by the narcissism o’ Americans that lead every 1 o’ them to believe that they’ll be the master o’ something. It’d be refreshing to see 1 who actually does the math & realizes that the net # o’ masters is far lower than the net # o’ not-even-jacks-o’-all-trades & acknowledge they’ll probably end up a superfluous office drone—or worse, on the run from drones dropped by totalitarian government snatchers.

Do you admit that you’re a superfluous office drone/insane bum on the run from drones dropped by totalitarian government snatchers & that you’re a sick fuck who smashes your fingers gainst hard objects? Share in the comments.

Then put a sweater on, asshole.

Tricky, tricky, Mr. America:
I've 'scaped your traps so far;
but 1 day you'll get me.

I show no fear,
I feign ignorance;
but I know what you're boiling up...
Tricky li'l devil, you...

I know what you're planning:
you won't just smash me with your invisible palm;
you'll do it nice & slow...
Nice & slow...
Like a fine stew.
Delicious.

Can you taste the spiciness o' my blood,
the tanginess o' my gizzards?
No...
No, you wouldn't, would you...
You wouldn't taste nothing at all,
wouldn't even notice my stew 'pon your plate.
That's the trouble with you:
you're always so busy;
You never have time to enjoy the screams o' your prey.
Now, what kind o' life is that?
Get out mo', Mr. America;
breathe some fresh air.
I like to do that oft,
when it won't get me in trouble.
There are lots o' things that will get me in trouble.
Since you're so free,
you never tell me what they are.
So I have to guess.
Sometimes I guess wrong.
But that's OK.
I like the mental stimulation.

But you, Mr. America:
you're 'bove getting in trouble.
So, why aren't you happier?

I know you won't read this.
So many wives & not 'nough time to listen to them.
'Sides, you wouldn't like what they have to say.
That's OK.
I'd like to say that you'll regret me when I'm gone;
but that would not be perfectly accurate.
So, please, don't finish that stew I made for you if you don't want it.
I did a bad job, anyway.
I'm always doing a bad job.
I even tried ripping a few pieces o' my flesh
& adding them as you like.
But I guess it wasn't...
No.
No, there's no use in laboring the issue.
Just shove it to the side.
Someone will pick it up eventually.
& if not, the flies will surely enjoy it.

I must confess, it’s refreshing to see a post-regurgitator outright acknowledge his preference for easy mediocrity over “art for art’s sake.”

I still think my own mo’-honest philosophy o’ “High-quality is probably better, but I’m both too shoddy & too attention-hungry, so I’ll just throw my shit in your face like a baboon & let you assholes suffer.”

Also, stop asking for comments with your tacky SEO-whoring bold text, you cretins. If people want to comment & see a comments section, they’ll comment.

The Earthbound/Mother series is 1 o’ those cult classics that nobody cared ’bout when it came out ’cept a few, those few became fanatics with a fervor rivaling political groups, till it spread so far that now the internet’s full o’ people praising it, including the creators o’ South Park.

I would say that I mentioned my inclusion in this group in my review o’ Earthbound Zero, ’cept I’ve just realized that I failed to publish that article ’cause I’m apparently mo’ lazy ’bout publishing content than actually writing it (still working on that immensely-groundbreaking article analyzing Donkey Kong Country levels, by the way). You could’ve also looked through the sidebar, which includes some Earthbound website, I guess—as well as many websites I haven’t been to in years, since my interests are as fleeting as the seasons.

Anyway, some fans are working on an unauthorized 4th game, & if you’ve seen their previews on their site, you were probably as excited as I was: look @ that amazing web design!

The Strengths o’ Mother 4’s Web Design

I. The Font’s Readable

Though it could be bigger, it’s much bigger than most websites, which for some reason take microscopic text that’s impossible to read without pressing your face right into the monitor as the apex o’ quality design.

They’re wrong. Letting Grampa Mezun read your text without squinting & raising his monocle is.

Also, Mother 4’s site uses Roboto & I like Roboto. That’s 1 o’ those things you can’t truly ’splain. I mean just look @ that font! How can you not love Roboto?

II. The Color Scheme’s Simple

The site mainly just uses white, dark gray, & red—hardly the most original colors. However, they’re used in a way that still heighten contrast. Usually by trading them back & forth as backgrounds & text colors for different sections.

It also makes rare use o’ subtle texture, such as the faded earth @ the top & the crosshatches for the music section. This is better than a big, colorful background that distracts attention.

Granted, a lot o’ websites go the other way & have just gray & white, which is why the red is necessary, like strawberries dabbled on a vanilla cake.

III. Objects are spaced out well.

A web design fad developing recently that I actually like is the turn toward bigger sites—bigger in that the text is bigger & the content takes up mo’ space, rather than trying to cram a bunch o’ tiny elements into 1 screen. By spacing out content, web designers make it easier for users to parse content & less likely to have to hunt it down, since it’s set down piece by piece.

The only downside is that it creates a greater need for scrolling; but as plenty o’ research has shown, this is hardly a problem—much simpler to scroll straight downward through content than trying to wander all round a screen packed together in many directions.

Ironically, ’nother pattern that’s emerged does the opposite: putting a ton o’ social media & links that stay with the screen as one scrolls. This site only has the slim navigation & small return-to-top button stay on-screen, both o’ which are actually useful.

Other websites put that crap all over the screen, which can oft get in the way o’ the text when one resizes their tiny text ’cause apparently they never thought that one might do that, even though said functionality is in every browser.

IV. Other

The way the top links change based on your position on the page—the links actually go to anchors on the same page, not different pages—& the smoth way it glides up & down are neat.

Actually, that 1st point reminds me o’ something else:

V. Doesn’t cut content into a million pages.

In the 90s ’twas common to see websites all mashed together in 1 huge page. I think those crazy ideology websites like Jesus is Savior & Rense are the most infamous, as well as whatever this site’s s’posed to be.

This has unfortunately led the web in the other direction: splitting content into as many pages as possible. I’m always bewildered when I read a newspaper article & see it split into pages. Why? Do they think I’ll only want to read half o’ it?

The problem is, while putting all content into 1 page is a processing—& thus time—burden ’cause it forces 1 to get all content @ once, splitting it too much can, too, since it forces 1 to load a whole ’nother page & wait ’gain.

I joked to myself when comparing David Wonn’s amazing glitch website that you should definitely read, which hasn’t been updated since 2006, & a newer glitch wiki—whose design can’t be blamed on its creator, since it just uses a Wikidot default. Though the former packs half o’ an entire system’s glitches into single pages, they still load mo’ quickly than going through each individual page for each individual glitch in the wiki.

Consequently, the former’s mo’ enjoyable to read, even if it looks like a book written in neon signs. It may be due to my relatively slow internet, but the wiki’s like reading a book & having to wait minutes before each page. Wouldn’t that be annoying to read?

’Course, Wonn had full control over his site’s design, whereas I doubt the wiki’s creator had any. Furthermo’, I suspect the reason for splitting content so much may have to do with economics—mo’ ad views—than design. But this still confuses me, as there should be a way to have both. After all, couldn’t you make the ad stay on-screen no matter how long an article is? Couldn’t you automatically make the ad change without changing the page? & wouldn’t the ad still steal as much attention as on page load?

Conclusion

The 1 flaw I’d say is the way the blog is a totally different website, lacking the navigation o’ the original, thus making one go back in one’s browser history to go back. Perhaps there was something ’bout Tumblr’s… social whatever? I don’t know. Something ’bout Tumblr that they wanted & couldn’t get from a blog included directly into their website.

O yeah, & I guess the graphics & the music are neat & I remember some gameplay mechanic someone said they were adding that I can’t find info for anymo’ that I thought sounded interesting.

Don't fuck it up.

It's okay...
Everything'll be fine...

But don't fuck it up.

Think how exciting it must be!
	The risks!
Throw down the dice
	& how you don't get snake eyes...
		You'll shrivel and die...

You'll do fine...
If you truly want to live,
	You'll do everything right.
The hand knows everything...
	It knows if you've been bad or good,
Knows whether you have or have not been efficient.
Would it harm you if you didn't deserve it?
	How would we know if you didn't?
The hand knows.
It knows you.
You don't know it.
You can't even see it.
You're nothing to it.

So shut up,
Calm down,
Button-up that jacket, chap,
& go to town.
Everything'll work out swell.

Everything's safe here.

Just. Don't. Fuck it up.

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