Elm, Elm, Elm, leaves are gone ¿so soon? Hardly seen them. Withered, crumpled, blackened… ¿But why these words? ¿Would we e’er call them towering, plain, eye-seeringly sickly green in the o’erbearing summer? Slowly… I scoop them in my icy-dried granite hands— But race, the thoughts— I must, I can’t… There’s nowhere to preserve them from […]
It’s not so much that I haven’t been working on my stupid project since my last post,–quite contrarily, I’ve been working on it mo’ than mo’ important work–but that I haven’t felt like there was much to show ’bout it. & I think talking ’bout refactoring out sprite movement code into “Movement Components” to separate […]
When the average person thinks o’ the Bible, they think o’ a few famous stories, like “Genesis,” “Exodus,” “Jonah,” & the 4 gospels, which make up only a tiny percentage o’ its bulk, most o’ which is made up o’ forgettable fluff o’ random Jews like Isaiah & Jeremiah1 ranting for pages & pages ’bout […]
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Comprehensive Beginner Guide to Choosing a Web Host O, fun. I can already guess what I’m going to get from this: those luscious affiliate links. Since every host review on the planet has affiliate links—e’en those that criticize corrupt web host reviews, ironically—I can only imagine that a website as corrupt as 1st Web Designer’s […]
I promised to neglect keeping up on these, & I kept my promise. Most o’ what I’ve done was mo’ design than programming, but it did involve programming in quite a bit o’ custom sprites. Wasabi Woods Planned to be the 1st forest level & 2nd level o’erall. For it I created “Bad Apple” enemies, […]
Fucking 1st Web Designer—Just Fucking 1st Web Designer. What I love most ’bout this recent article wherein they give terrible advice, as always, is how every time I reread it, I keep finding new problems. It’s like the James Joyce’s Ulysses o’ shittiness: you need supplementary material to get it all. Like, for instance, it […]
I. EarthBound I’ll actually start with EarthBound ’stead o’ Beginnings, not just ’cause that’s the 1st game most English-speakers played & ’cause that’s the most notable o’ the series (in both the western world & Japan), but ’cause some points I make here will be relevant for Beginnings. Way back when I started this blog—which […]
(Courtesy o’ John Jacob Whistleford, the Plot Generator) Bubsy Bubs was thinking about Pepsi Cola again. Pepsi was a piratical clutter with big in the grits spleen and skimpy phantom leg. Bubsy walked over to the window and reflected on his pumpkin-colored surroundings. He had always hated dank my face with its warm, watery whirlpools. […]
To celebrate The Mezunian’s move to a better, spicier website, I’ve decided I’m finally going to ’splain the origins o’ my tagline, “Die Positivität ist das Opium des Volkes, aber der Spott ist das Opium der Verrückten,” which, from the pinnacle o’ my memory, means something ’long the edges o’, “Positivity is the opium o’ […]
